ARE ONLINE FRIENDS REAL?

ARE ONLINE FRIENDS REAL?

I remember back in 96 or 97, maybe 98 when I discovered AOL and the chat rooms.  That’s where I met my friend, Patty.  We both had little kids, she had two older kids.  Our marriages sucked and we weren’t very happy at the time.  Who on AOL was?  Lol

She says she stalked me until we became friends.  I’m glad she did.  Back in those days communication was by instant messaging.  She and I both typed over 100 wpm.  We would carry on two conversations at once:  mine to her and hers to me.  We laughed, loved, cried, and wondered where in the world would our lives take us.  The one thing we both had was a wicked sense of humor; we still do.  I often wondered if people you meet online could actually become real friends.  They can.

We used to kid that someday we were going to live together, which was funny because it didn’t look like we would ever even meet.  We talked about the house, sitting on the veranda, what we would wear, etc.  It was always the same story, same scene.  In about 2004 she came through Houston and that’s when we met for the first time.  We had a great time.   She ended up moving to Florida in 2012.  I decided to spend my vacation with her that year and the next.  We got along so great!  When I left both times she told me she left things of mine in my bedroom and on the table between our rockers.  She said it made her feel like I was still there.

In October 2013 she moved back to El Paso.  To her it just was no longer home.  She floundered for a few months trying to decide should she stay or should she go.  I told her she was welcome to move in with me.  She made a list of pros and cons for her various choices, called me a few days later and said, “Can I come to Houston in 2 weeks?”  And she did.  That was in March 2014.

A few weeks ago she found out her oldest son is much sicker than anyone realized.   The decision was made to move him back to El Paso after he said he wanted to go home.  Patty and her baby boy, Charlie, are completely re-arranging their lives to get her oldest moved, settled and stable.  Just like I have sung, “You are my sunshine” to Ashlie since she was a baby, I imagine Patty sings that to Charlie in her heart always.

I knew today was coming.  We have been counting the days down for the last 14 days.  Living life every day since then.  Sort of ignoring that she really was going to leave.  She didn’t even start packing until yesterday.  We had our little dinner party last night.  Marisela, Cody, Ashlie and Daniel, Nate (my mechanic, landscaper, and handy man who is finishing and completing the work all my contractors didn’t) and me.  This morning I woke her up to tell her good-bye.  She said, “the bed will be made, my flip flops will be by the bed, I left some clothes in the closet and my books are on the chest.  It will be like I’m still here.”  Just like in Florida.

These 6 months have gone by so quickly.  She has told me that living in Houston with me was what she needed.  She has become much healthier.  She’s been able to heal from the craziness she had to live in Florida (taking care of another family member).  One of the things I so appreciate is her relationship with Cody.  They have a lot in common and spent hours talking and discussing the books they read together.  She embraced Ashlie and they would hang out together even when I was gone.  I loved coming home from work and seeing her sitting in her chair in the driveway.  We often sat out there together and talked and laughed.  Always we laughed.

I loved having her in the house even if we hardly spoke that day.  We cohabitated well together.  Both of us are loners who enjoy interacting together.  She made us some delicious meals.  We listened to each other’s problems, sometimes we gave advice; sometimes we just stayed quiet.  We both had sad times these 6 months but many more good times.  I remember when we took her to Galveston for the day.  She, Marisela and I had a great time!  And out of the deal, Marisela and Patty each gained a new friend.

We have always said that we were like sisters.  Friends and sisters.  We have always used these two lines from this White Christmas song for us:

Sisters, sisters 
There were never such devoted sisters, 

Lord help the mister who comes between me and my sister 
And lord help the sister, who comes between me and my man

Hahaha  yep, that was our song!

I’m gonna miss you so much, Patty.  I am believing that you will be home in January.  If your life takes you down another path, you know that I will support you.  Just thinking about you leaving & being gone when I get home makes my eyes overflow with tears.  You aren’t just my friend; you are my family.

I love you, baby!  Hurry home!

copyrighted 2014

caryn cannatella

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